The Key of Awesome, Justin Brown, Mark Douglas - I Need A Doctor lyrics

I'm the ghost of Christmas past
Please don't look at my ass
All sad Eminem raps must have a Dido
Remember Dido? Well, I'm the new Dido, Dido
Now here's a pissed off rap

Oh my god, it's kinda odd that you got
All these wires and tubes
Coming outcha body, oops
I just saw your balls and pubes
Come on Dre, please, wake up
I brought you some Shape-ups
You used to be the man now you
Can't even pick a grape up
Hey, all I'm sayin' is you
Better not be fakin' this
I just found a wallet
Is it yours? Well I'm takin' it
What if I bent back your wrist?
Or put some red stuff on your lips?
Look, it's Angela Basset
What is this a bag of piss?
You're in a coma so it
Makes it less embarrassing
For me to own up to
The feelings I've been harboring
What I'm trying to say Dre
Is that you complete me
If I was a cup of sake, you would be sashimi
And if you feel the way I do
I just need a sign from you
Just a tiny movement of a finger
Or a toe will do
Wait, did you just move your ear?
Well I'm readin' you loud and clear
Lay back, I'll do all the work
I'm awake, you stupid jerk

I was not expecting that
That was kind of messed up
But it explains some stuff
He acts homophobic so no-one will notice
It's all been decoded
Me thinks he doth protest too much

It literally was the most disgusting
Thing I've ever seen
Your white lips were hovering and puckering
You tried to have your way with
Me while I was barely alive
I was trying to give you
CPR till the nurse arrived
I don't know Slim
That excuse seems pretty thin
Let's just get on with your rehabilitation
Just help me work out cus I'm
Tryin' to get sexy and buff
Do me a favor and inject
This needle into my butt
There's nothin' weird about that I
Can do that for you
That's just the kind of thing a
Friend would have another friend do
I know that there's nothing wrong with it
Shut up and get on with it
Before we get old, man
My butt's getting cold, Slim
You're cold? That's probably cause
You never stretched out
Don't you it's the most important
Part of a work out?
You know a rub down might even be necessary
Are you any good those? Oh, most definitely

Why don't you two just make out
That's what this is about
Join the parade outside
I've made mango martinis
And some cocktail weenies
Come out of the closet, you meanies
And show some rainbow pride