The Stupendium - Fazbear Family lyrics

Open up the doors and let them in
Gotta mop the floors and clear the bins!
Better check the stores and order in!
Don’t you just adore this sort of thing?

Welcome to Fazbear Training and
Your new career!
Please just ignore the staining
The last guy disappeared
Management may be frustrating
It's gonna be weird
To host team meetings as
The only employee here!
It's guaranteed that you'll
Probably succeed
Cutting corners is just how you achieve
Remember that return custom is key
So try to let at least a few of them leave


Lally's Lollies! You'll have a
Lolly good time!

Welcome to the Fazbear Family!
Clean family fun! (With some tragedy)
You've sunk your savings
They'll sink their teeth
Into a juicy slice! (Or a lobotomy)
Who's scared of a little liability?
Health and Safety? More of a luxury
You've got a lot to learn
So if it's unclear
Just know the crusts aren’t all
That's getting stuffed here

Congratulations on completing your
First day however
Your job isn't over just yet

Hear the creaking of gears creep in your ears
Deep secrets we have been keeping for years
Can you keep from their teeth
And your sheets from arrears?
No funeral cover, so sort your affairs
Who would think pizza could be
Such a lethal career?
That cuddly creatures could leave
You in tears?
No culinary teachers could leave you prepared
For guarding the kitchen while
Screaming in fear


You gotta be kidding me, kiddies come here?
For tyrannical mechanical murderous bears?
I was planning for a life as a restaurateur
So robotics was probably an awful idea!
Now I’m the boss of a cursed pizzeria
I'm no villain
Just an innocent entrepreneur
I want to fill children with
Fun and with cheer!
Not kill them and fill them
With pistons and gears!

Marty's Plungers! Nothin' goes down
That can't come up!

Welcome to the Fazbear Family!
Clean family fun! (With some tragedy)
You've sunk your savings
They'll sink their teeth
Into a juicy slice! (Or a lobotomy)
Who's scared of a little liability?
Health and Safety? More of a luxury
You've got a lot to learn
So if it's unclear
Just know the crusts aren’t all
That's getting stuffed here

So, play the music, light the lights
You're gonna get a private show tonight
Discount items might be nice
But save too much, you'll pay the price!
There's a world of cheap attractions to buy!
Or save the cash and find them outside
That pestilent elephant is a hell of a find
But a malevolent element could develop inside
We're gonna get you to the end of the week
Now you can run a restaurant effortlessly
‘Cus you can clean the toilets at
The press of a key!
Just check the ball pit for any fleshy debris


Flo's Glossy Floss! The first
Step to true romance!

Welcome to the Fazbear Family!
Clean family fun! (With some tragedy)
You've sunk your savings
They'll sink their teeth
Into a juicy slice! (Or a lobotomy)
Who's scared of a little liability?
Health and Safety? More of a luxury
You've got a lot to learn
So if it's unclear
Just know the crusts aren’t all
That's getting stuffed here

Hey, BonBon! It's the birthday boy!

Well hello again! Here we go
Again! Start the show again!
I think we all know the
Direction this is going in!
You sit by the vents and
Prevent us getting in then you get a hug
From a friendly exoskeleton!

No use in fleeing, you're
Feeding the sequence, keeps repeating
No time for grieving
The scene is teeming with demon playthings
Reeking and leaking
Unspeakable freaks who need spring cleaning
Just keep the springs dry or
You’ll end up screaming!

It’s safe to say you aren’t
What we all expected
But you’re a gift and it’d be
Rude to just reject it
We were built to dance and
Sing but we’re infected so make us whole
Feed us the souls that you’ve collected

I’m not a monster, I just want to be liked
Am I what you designed
Daddy? Do you feel pride?
I want to talk about these feelings inside
But every time I open up
Some children tend to die!

Congratulations, your probation was
A triumph! But we're afraid that you're
Now surplus to requirement
Unfortunately, we will have to
Keep you silent
You'll find our severance package
Gets a little violent!

Welcome to the Fazbear Family!
Clean family fun! (With some tragedy)
You've sunk your savings
They'll sink their teeth
Into a juicy slice! (Or a lobotomy)
Who's scared of a little liability?
Health and Safety? More of a luxury
You've got a lot to learn
So if it's unclear
Just know the crusts aren’t all
That's getting stuffed here'!

Hoo hoo! Is it getting hot in here
Or is it j-j-just me?