"Weird Al" Yankovic, Tom Kenny - TMZ lyrics

You're sort of famous, a minor celebrity
And so it only makes sense the world would be
Obsessed with every single thing you do
They're running 'round with their
Camcorders in the night
They're lurking patiently and hoping
That they just might
See something real embarrassing you do

The bad hair day and sweat-stained t-shirt
That's the story that they're gonna feature
With exclusive pics of your flabby behind
You think you're all alone
But that's right when you'll find

A bunch of paparazzi popping out of nowhere
Cameras in your face, and then suddenly
You're on TMZ, you're on TMZ

Following you when you're walking
Down the street
And asking stupid questions while
You're trying to eat
So you cover your face, thinking to yourself
"Hey, isn't this creepy?"
And they're out there praying you'll
Have a big meltdown
And take 'em on a little car
Chase through this whole town
They'll be there with you when
You're going to jail
First on the scene for every wardrobe fail

You just picked up some transvestite
Seconds later, it's up on the website
Get a Vegas wedding, a quickie divorce
And they'll be sneaking
In, snapping pictures, of course

And if they ever catch you picking your nose
Or stumblin' down the street
On a drunken spree you're on TMZ
Stalking you, just waiting by your front door
Trailing you through airport security
They're with TMZ, they're with TMZ

"We caught this Oscar nominee
Picking up dog poop!" "Is that a baby bump?"
"I pronounce you guilty… of leaving
The house while fat!"
"Look who's drinking coffee!"
"Everything celebrities do is fascinating!"

Oh, let me tell you
It's getting to the point where
A famous person can't
Even get a DUI or go on a racist rant
Those guys are all around
So you really shouldn't dare
Go to every club in town
If you've lost your underwear

Seems that every single time
A star decides to
Shave their head or ram their car into a tree
They're on TMZ
If they catch you peeing in the bushes
Later on that night, well, I guarantee
You're on TMZ, you're on TMZ

You're on TMZ
Every single celebrity knows they're gonna be
There on TMZ