Stephen Lynch - Craig lyrics

Everyone knows Jesus the man
Who healed the lame
Well I am Jesus's brother craig is my name
Jesus is the Prince of Peace
Jesus is the Lamb
Jesus is the Son of God but
Craig don't give a damn

Because when Craig's in sight
We'll party all damn night!
I don't turn water into wine
But into cold Coors Light!
I'm not my brother, I know don't walk on H2O
But we got hydroponic shit that
Me and Judas grow! I'm fuckin' Craig!
Craig Christ

I hang out with lepers barabbas and Salome
Jesus' friends are called apostles
Those dudes are totally gay
Jesus performs miracles from Galilee to Rome
But it would be a miracle if
He brought a fuckin' lady home

Because while Jesus is prayin'
Fuckin' Craig is layin'
Every lady in the Testament you
Know what I'm sayin'?
I won't die for you sin like my famous kin
But, if you got a little sister
Then there's room at this inn!

I'm fuckin' Craig! I'm fufah Crah!
Craig Christ

Jesus was our mother's fav'
All her love to him she gave
But there's no sibling rivalry
When he's nailed to that tree, yeah!
And now the question for you
Is not "What Would Jesus Do?"
But "Where will you be when the
Craig Machine comes partyin' through?"
And if the Lord will allow
You've got to ask yourself how
And who and why and when and
Where is your Messiah now?

It's fuckin' Craig! Fuckin' Craig!
Fuckin' Craig! I'm fuckin' Crrraaaaiiig!
Craig Christ i'm fuckin' Craig