Bart Baker - Happy Parody lyrics

I'm forty-one but look like I am eight
Thirty-two pounds is how much I weigh
My hat's so big you can see it from space
And this song's so overplayed it
Will drive you insane

Cue awful dancing
Clap along if you love watching
People who can't dance my style is tacky
I look like Smokey the Bear
In this ridiculous brown hat
This song's so crappy
That it's used by the army
To torture people in Iraq i'm so unhappy
But, you'd never know because I just
Did a shit ton of crack

I really owe Daft Punk and Robin Thicke
(yeah)
Cause without them I'd be irrelevant (yeah)
You need to polish our dicks
Until they both shine (yeah)
But before that let's snort
Some blurred lines

We're way too happy
Clap along if you're high and
You just wanna clap we're way too happy
The only way to stand this song is
To take ecstasy and do smack
Happy, happy, happy
Apparently saying the same word ninety
Times guarantees a smash happy, happy, happy
Holy shit, I love happiness
Please take all of my hard-earned cash

I'm shaking now (Happy, happy, happy)
Did so much speed (Happy, happy, happy)
Have to make sure that I stay happy
(Happy, happy, happy)
So I can brainwash humanity
(Happy, happy, happy) with this dumb song
And then, sell more CDs

Stop, I'm here to sue Pharrell
I'm a Prozac attorney
The whole world's happy because
Of this goddamn song
And our drug sales are tanking
Freeze, Style Police
Pharrell, you're under arrest for
That fugly-ass brown headpiece
But, it's trendy!
It's way too big for your head
You look like an ad for Arby's!
Guys, stop arguing
Pharrell, I got your tests back and found
Out why your hat looks so big
You are shrinking
That is also why your voice
Sounds like a prepubescent kid
What are you saying?!
According to this chart
You have ten more seconds to live
Doc, please, help me!
There's nothing that can be done
Say goodbye to your fake happiness

Thank God that horrible song is over!
Now, will someone please
Get in here and burn that fucking hat?