Family Guy - Down's Syndrome Girl (From Family Guy) lyrics

You've got to look your best
Tonight you tubby little parasite
'Cause there's a lovely lady and
She's waiting for you
And though her pretty face may seem
A special person's wettest dream
Before you get to see it
There are things you must do

We'll try a tie and boutonniere of yellow
Or a rose that shows that
You're a classy fellow
With the posh panache of
Jefferson at Monticello
Busting out a mile with style

I know you just can't wait to stare at all
That luscious orange hair
But, boy, before you touch a single curl
You must impress that
Ultra bloomin', all-consumin'
Poorly groomin' down Syndrome girl

On any normal day you reek as
If you're on a farting streak
Your finger's up your nose And
You are dripping with drool
But, if you want a lady's love
You’re better off by smelling of
A gentleman's cologne instead of
Sneakers and stool

A squirt, a spurt of something just for Ellen
And you'll see
That she will find you so compellin'
And she does, because the only smell that
She'll be smellin'
Won't be coming from your bum

You wanna take that little whore and
Spin her on the dancing floor
But boy, before you do a single twirl
You must impress that
Effervescing, self-possessing, no BS-ing
Down Syndrome girl

Her eyes are emerald portals to
A secret land of love and her smile is like
The sweetest summer flower
Her kiss is so inviting and
Her hugs are so delighting
And what makes them really nice is
That they've got a little spice
Because they're tighter than a vise and
They go on for an hour
(Stewie and Chris tap dance)

My boy, between the two of us
We’ll get you on that shorty bus
And then you're gonna take it for a whirl
Now go impress that
Super-thrilling, wish-fulfilling
Yoo hoo spilling
Ultra-swinging, boner-bringing, gaily
Singing, dingalinging
Stupefying, fortifying, as of Monday
Shoelace tying stimulating, titillating
Kitty-cat impersonating
Mega-rocking, pillow talking
Just a little crooked walking
Coyly pouting, booby-sprouting
For some reason always shouting
Fascinating, captivating
Happiness and joy creating
Down Syndrome Girl!