John Mulaney - Is That Something You Find Funny Mr. Mulaney? lyrics
[John Mulaney - Is That Something You Find Funny Mr. Mulaney? lyrics]
I like to throw an "I’m kidding"
At the ends of jokes now
In case the jokes are ever played in
Court you ever heard a joke
Played in court? Never goes
Well they’re like
"‘And that’s why you shouldn’t
Give to charity’ Is that something you
Find funny, Mr mulaney?" Um
At the time i found
Out recently that jokes don’t do
Well in court so
Some friends of mine were sued
In college for property
Damage and they were guilty and the lawsuit
Dragged on for years and
Years and eventually, i got a call when I
Was 28 years old it was my
Friend from college, he said, "Hey
That lawsuit with my neighbor is
Still dragging on and my
Neighbor just subpoenaed all my
Emails from college that
Mention him or the lawsuit" And I said
"That’s crazy but why are you calling me?"
And he said, "Because you should
Be concerned" He said, "I have
An email here from junior year
Where I wrote, ‘Hey, guys
I’m going to miss practice tonight because I
Have to meet with my neighbor
About that lawsuit thing’ And
You replied, ‘Hey
Do you want me to kill that
Guy for you? Because it
Sounds like he sucks and I
Will totally kill that guy
For you okay, see you at improv practice!'"
Of all the sentences in that email
I would be ashamed to have read out
Loud in a court of law
I think the top one is
"See you at improv practice"
At the ends of jokes now
In case the jokes are ever played in
Court you ever heard a joke
Played in court? Never goes
Well they’re like
"‘And that’s why you shouldn’t
Give to charity’ Is that something you
Find funny, Mr mulaney?" Um
At the time i found
Out recently that jokes don’t do
Well in court so
Some friends of mine were sued
In college for property
Damage and they were guilty and the lawsuit
Dragged on for years and
Years and eventually, i got a call when I
Was 28 years old it was my
Friend from college, he said, "Hey
That lawsuit with my neighbor is
Still dragging on and my
Neighbor just subpoenaed all my
Emails from college that
Mention him or the lawsuit" And I said
"That’s crazy but why are you calling me?"
And he said, "Because you should
Be concerned" He said, "I have
An email here from junior year
Where I wrote, ‘Hey, guys
I’m going to miss practice tonight because I
Have to meet with my neighbor
About that lawsuit thing’ And
You replied, ‘Hey
Do you want me to kill that
Guy for you? Because it
Sounds like he sucks and I
Will totally kill that guy
For you okay, see you at improv practice!'"
Of all the sentences in that email
I would be ashamed to have read out
Loud in a court of law
I think the top one is
"See you at improv practice"