Saturday Night Live - I'm Just Pete lyrics

"So like what is Pete even gonna do?"
"I have no idea, he only has like one character"
"Yeah, why is he hosting again?
He just left, and it's not like his show was a hit"
"I know right, like how you get
Joe Pesci and Edie Falco, and no viewers?"

No one cares about the work I do
I made a show with Joe Pesci, too
And no one streamed it but my mom
When I'm high, I do things like call up Colin Jost
And say, "Homie, we should buy a boat"
They tell me I have "butthole eyes"
Yet I never sleep alone at night

'Cause I'm just Pete
Anyone else, I'd be a three
But I guess I'm hot for dudes in comedy
'Cause it's an ugly industry
I'm just Pete
Looking like a meth head on the street
People online still call me "Skete"
Because of a guy whose name
I can't say legally

Petes, assemble
Black Pete.
It's just black Pete, then?
All right

I'm 6'4" and 100 pounds
But I got power
Do you think it's hot that
I rip cigs when I'm in the shower
And out of the blue, like three times
A year, when you least expect it
I go to rehab

Can you feel that energy?
(Energy, energy, energy, energy)
That famous BD energy?
(Energy, energy, energy, energy)

Can you feel that energy?
(Energy, energy, energy, energy)
That Pete, bipolar energy?
(Energy, energy, energy, energy)

I'm just Pete
My dating life is not discrete
I generate tons of publicity
For everything except my comedy
I'm just Pete and I like jugs
I'm mentally ill and I'm on drugs

But, hey
I'm still in Super Bowl commercials
My name's Pete (And so is mine)
I deleted all my accounts online
'Cause the doctor said
The internet wasn't good for me
Baby, I'm Pete

"Are you ready, Pete?"
"Sure am, Barbie. Aw, not again"