Larry the Cable Guy - Titty Bar Christmas lyrics
[Larry the Cable Guy - Titty Bar Christmas lyrics]
You know, everybody has their special
Christmas memories
When you got your first Bible, when your
Relatives were all in eating oyster soup this
Is my favorite memory of all
And I writ a poem about it it's called
'Titty Bar Christmas' hope you enjoy it
'twas the night before Christmas
When throughout the trailer park
Everyone was sleeping except for a
Couple Haitian immigrants taking out
The radio in my car while I was parked
And me and my Dick Trickle undershorts
Cleaning my truck, full of dirt
Wondered how I got ketchup stains
On my new 'Who
Farted?' shirt that's why I
Can't have nice things
When down at the titty club
I heard they was packed
So I put on some boots and
I drove down there with DeWayne
Parked in the back
Well, we walked inside and what did we see
But an Oriental stripper that wanted
To dance for me so I sit on the couch
Spread-eagle with a beer
As ol' Ling Chow gave
Me some Christmas cheer (sucky sucky)
I felt like a king, I was proud as a peach
Heck, I was ready for more
I wanted one of each
I was getting demanding and I
Was kind of a dick you know
Yelling at the girls to dance
And wanting 'em quick
'Hey Candy! Come here! Show me that butt!
And Ginger and Coco, rub on my nuts
Hey Blondie
Turn around! Are them real or fake?
They gotta be real
That plastic don't shake'
They was redheads and brunettes
It was the best Christmas by far
Then we run out of money, left for the car
And later that night as I slept in my bed
With visions of T backs still
Dancing in my head
I smiled and dreamed of boobs big and small
Oh, that Titty Bar Christmas was
The greatest of all
Christmas memories
When you got your first Bible, when your
Relatives were all in eating oyster soup this
Is my favorite memory of all
And I writ a poem about it it's called
'Titty Bar Christmas' hope you enjoy it
'twas the night before Christmas
When throughout the trailer park
Everyone was sleeping except for a
Couple Haitian immigrants taking out
The radio in my car while I was parked
And me and my Dick Trickle undershorts
Cleaning my truck, full of dirt
Wondered how I got ketchup stains
On my new 'Who
Farted?' shirt that's why I
Can't have nice things
When down at the titty club
I heard they was packed
So I put on some boots and
I drove down there with DeWayne
Parked in the back
Well, we walked inside and what did we see
But an Oriental stripper that wanted
To dance for me so I sit on the couch
Spread-eagle with a beer
As ol' Ling Chow gave
Me some Christmas cheer (sucky sucky)
I felt like a king, I was proud as a peach
Heck, I was ready for more
I wanted one of each
I was getting demanding and I
Was kind of a dick you know
Yelling at the girls to dance
And wanting 'em quick
'Hey Candy! Come here! Show me that butt!
And Ginger and Coco, rub on my nuts
Hey Blondie
Turn around! Are them real or fake?
They gotta be real
That plastic don't shake'
They was redheads and brunettes
It was the best Christmas by far
Then we run out of money, left for the car
And later that night as I slept in my bed
With visions of T backs still
Dancing in my head
I smiled and dreamed of boobs big and small
Oh, that Titty Bar Christmas was
The greatest of all