Larry the Cable Guy - Waiter Commentary lyrics
[Larry the Cable Guy - Waiter Commentary lyrics]
What the hell is this, Russia?
We was out eating Christmas dinner
And I tell you what
I'd hate to be a waitress or a waiter good
Lord! Waiting tables got to be the worst job
In the world you always hear folks say
'It's better than waiting tables'
Hey, what do you do for a living?
'Oh, I swim in a lake of
Turds looking for lost change'
Man, that must suck 'Well, it does
But it beats waiting tables'
What do you do?
'Well, I used to wait tables but it sucked
So bad now I got a job for
The government jumping on landmines
And having 'em explode
Underneath me ripping my guts out but
Hey at least I ain't gotta
Fetch some jackass coffee' tell you what
Folks i ain't never waited no tables a day
In my life, but good Lord! If it's that bad
Then we ought to get rid of the death
Penalty and sentence folks to five years of
Table-waiting down there at the
Waffle House i'd
Love to see that day of sentencing
'Mr anderson
You've been convicted to 32 counts of murder
And mutilation i hereby sentence you
To the night shift at the Denny's
Down there on the corner'
Lawyer stands up 'Your honor
This is inhumane surely you could
Find it in your
Heart to fry my client or firing squad him'
Judge says, 'Overruled bailiff
Give that sum-bitch an apron and a time
Card and get him away from me'
Tell you what
What a drag waiting tables must be like
A waiter once said, looking at
The one ads, 'Hey
Give me the phone! They's
Hiring boil-suckers down
There at the hospital' Unquote git-R-Done!
We was out eating Christmas dinner
And I tell you what
I'd hate to be a waitress or a waiter good
Lord! Waiting tables got to be the worst job
In the world you always hear folks say
'It's better than waiting tables'
Hey, what do you do for a living?
'Oh, I swim in a lake of
Turds looking for lost change'
Man, that must suck 'Well, it does
But it beats waiting tables'
What do you do?
'Well, I used to wait tables but it sucked
So bad now I got a job for
The government jumping on landmines
And having 'em explode
Underneath me ripping my guts out but
Hey at least I ain't gotta
Fetch some jackass coffee' tell you what
Folks i ain't never waited no tables a day
In my life, but good Lord! If it's that bad
Then we ought to get rid of the death
Penalty and sentence folks to five years of
Table-waiting down there at the
Waffle House i'd
Love to see that day of sentencing
'Mr anderson
You've been convicted to 32 counts of murder
And mutilation i hereby sentence you
To the night shift at the Denny's
Down there on the corner'
Lawyer stands up 'Your honor
This is inhumane surely you could
Find it in your
Heart to fry my client or firing squad him'
Judge says, 'Overruled bailiff
Give that sum-bitch an apron and a time
Card and get him away from me'
Tell you what
What a drag waiting tables must be like
A waiter once said, looking at
The one ads, 'Hey
Give me the phone! They's
Hiring boil-suckers down
There at the hospital' Unquote git-R-Done!